Fanart, Fanfiction and Fangirling

OMG I've just drawn the greatest Christmas card ever! Or maybe I should say the crackiest. Is that even a word?!

I also had the peculiar experience of writing about my uncle's death for the newspaper. He was one of the local partisans who took part in the Resistance war from 1943 to 1945 and died a few days ago. He was my dad's eldest brother and I knew he was involved in the war in some way, but my father's never known much because my uncle didn't like talking about it. Today we talked to another uncle of mine and we found out some interesting facts, like his nickname. Every partisan used to have one in order to confuse the police and some nicknames stuck even after the end of the war. It's unbelievable how so many young people (my uncle was 18 at the time) went and fought for freedom. And I mean really fought, not just organised a strike or went to a demonstration: those boys fought against Nazi soldiers, for Heaven's sake.

And now I'll go watch Cinderella. The feminist in me always says fairy tales with a princess waiting for Prince Charming should be banned, but damn, Disney cartoons are the best.

I forgot to mention I stopped at Starbucks while I was at Alexa. I hadn't been at Starbucks since last December (in Leipzig with Patti), but I was thirsty and saw they had Caramel Frappuccino and thought "All right, I'll just be a tourist and get myself one." Since we don't have Starbucks in Italy, I always associate it with being on holiday and, thus, a tourist. Then while I was waiting I caught a glimpse of the cheesecake and got that too (I LOVE cheesecake, but hardly ever eat it in Italy). And as I sat down and began eating, "Just like heaven" by The Cure started playing. That's what I call a perfect little moment. <3

All right, I usually think horoscopes are utter rubbish, but this is exactly how I feel right now:

You may be hesitant to trust your feelings, even if you want to believe that everything is getting better. You might even fight against the changes as your life settles down. It's not that you don't want a more reasonable life; it's just that you have had a taste of excitement and are not looking forward to creating stability if it means endless boredom. Try to appreciate the slower pace without getting stuck in the same old rut.

Sigh.

I think I know what Farin feels like when he goes off to one of his x-month long journeys. I'm leaving to Berlin the day after tomorrow and the thought makes me euphoric. And that just for a 3-day stay.

Every time I go somewhere, especially abroad, I feel this rush. It's difficult to explain. I can't concentrate on simple everyday tasks, I get lost in thought, I forget everything. It's like being on drugs. Or being in love.

And every time I come back, there's a lump in my throat and I feel like a piece of my heart is ripped out and left there for me to come back and fetch it. Probably if I lived in another place long enough, I'd start missing Italy too, but now I just wish I was somewhere else. Anywhere but here.

Stupid, I know. But I can't help it.


PS Drabbles come later.

I mustn't look for WGs in Berlin, I mustn't look for WGs in Berlin, I mustn't look for WGs in Berlin...

Damn, this one's quite good and the girl living there is half-Italian...

Fuck. Moving there won't solve my problems. I'm my biggest problem. As I've recently read in "The witch's headstone" by Neil Gaiman "It's like people who think moving to a different place will make them happy. But wherever you go, you always take yourself with you." Or something along those lines, I read it in Italian.

Sigh.

Also, this name meme is creepily accurate. If we ignore the "extremely happy" and "suave and sexy" part, of course.

( Name meme )

Just one month till Farin's concert in Düsseldorf. And I'm not excited at all. :P Maybe it's because I've been quite busy at work, maybe because I'm still thinking of Bela's concerts (OMG the Hamburg one was a MONTH ago? Where did the time go???), but I'm not as excited as I was a month before leaving to Berlin. It may be because I simply LOVE Berlin (when will I finally move there?) and those were my holidays, so I really was counting off the days till I left, while now it's just a weekend, one that I planned so long ago I can barely remember buying the tickets. And I'm already thinking of the December gig(s). Or it's just that I'm a hopeless Bela fangirl and seeing him live only amplified my love for him, so poor Farin isn't quite at the centre of my thoughts at the moment. But I'm sure I'll have a good time.

Rehearsals started last Monday. We have to find a new drummer, because the one who plays with us now told us he doesn't have time anymore, as he already plays with another band. I'm not gonna mention I wrote a very silly message to a certain Norwegian drummer asking him if he was interested. XD And I found out beer works better than aspirin against colds. We went out to drink something after playing, I don't usually like beer, but as I was reading the list I came across "Weißbier Bock" and the description claimed it had a "hazelnut and chocolate flavour." I thought "WTF, a beer can't taste like that!" So I ordered it. Just for scientific curiosity, you know. Of course it didn't taste like hazelnut and chocolate at all, it's beer, not milkshake, but I did like it. And the next morning my cold was gone! YAY! :D

Other than that, I've been feeling weird these days. I guess the holiday effect is wearing off and the usual dull routine is starting to kick in. And I've placed too much hope in things that weren't worth it. Luckily I'm not the person I used to be and was aware of it from the beginning, I knew it was fun and I had to enjoy it till it lasted, nothing more. But it still hurt a little, realising how childish and naive I can be at times. Mmh, it sounds really vague and mysterious, doesn't it? And no, I'm not talking about my love life here, it's just boring everyday stuff. :P

I also need to start working on some old projects, I got some new ideas last summer (there's nothing like travelling when you need inspiration, as dear old Farin knows), but I always put it off, saying I still have time. Someone kick my lazy arse, please.

I hate writing entries like this, but I'm feeling really low these days. I guess it's just that all my friends are still on holiday and I'm feeling lonely, I can't even find someone to go to the cinema to see "Cars" with me. And work's been annoying, there isn't much to do, so we've been checking old stuff to see if everything's working as it should and it's really dull and boring. And my colleagues are getting on my nerves. Yesterday one of them told us he heard there's a new Vogue agency near our office; you can imagine the kind of comments they made about all the models they hope they'll meet. As if there weren't enough model agencies around here. Milan, bloody fashion capital. I'm used to their typically male comments, but when I'm feeling like this I'm easily annoyed. And I always feel so awkward and ugly when we walk past a group of models. :(

And I'd really like to read some new slash. Sublimation? Yes. *sulks*

Bah. Here, have a psycho!Farin pic. ♥



EDIT: Oh my God, just 10 days till Berlin!