I wrote Star Trek slash! TNG, P/Q, (almost) NC-17

[gothikmaus]

Written for ladykardasi. Challenge: use the following dialogue in a fic.

"What's wrong?"
"Do you want the socially acceptable answer or the truth?"
"The truth."
"I haven't had sex in a very long time, and you're really turning me on."

Set right after "Attached". Hope you'll like it Kira, this is my first time writing TNG slash.


Second best

Jean-Luc Picard stared at the closed door. He couldn't believe it. He had been denying his feelings for Beverly Crusher for almost twenty years, but after sharing a mind bond that had allowed the two of them to look into each other's heads, it was no use trying to hide them any longer. He had just managed to tell her that maybe it wasn't too late for them, and he knew she felt the same way, but she had simply kissed him on the cheek, told him some nonsense along the lines of "Let's just be friends," and left his quarters.

He couldn't believe it.

"Drawn a blank again, Jean-Luc?"

"Q," Picard said without turning around. "This really isn't the best moment for you to show up." He reached for his glass and gulped down what was left of his drink.

"Captain, captain," Q said in a singsong voice and sat down on the sofa next to him. "Be careful with that thing. It's not healthy to get drunk at your age."

"And since when do you worry about my health?"

"Oh, but I always have, mon capitaine," Q replied moving closer. He put his hands on Picard's shoulders and leaned forward so he could speak directly into the captain's ear. "If something were to happen to you, who would entertain me?" He slid his hands down Picard's arms. "You're my favourite toy."

Picard tensed up, but said nothing.

"What's wrong?" Q asked.

Picard hesitated. His reactions were slower than usual. Perhaps Q was right, he shouldn't have drunk so quickly. "Do you want the socially acceptable answer or the truth?"

"The truth."

"I haven't had sex in a very long time, and you're really turning me on."

Q raised an eyebrow. "Why, Jean-Luc, you've never told me you fancy me."

"I don't fancy you!" Picard said shrugging Q's hands off and turned around. "I just... You're..."

"Oh, I see." Q smiled knowingly. "You're horny. You want your pretty doctor. But she's not here. I'm your second best."

"I'm not... horny!" Picard exclaimed, blushing a little. "In fact, I'd like to go to bed and get some sleep, so if you'd just leave..."

"Jean-Luc, you should know better than lie to me," Q said, placing his hands on Picard's thighs and leaning closer. "I could even grow long, red hair if you'd like."

"Enough!"

Picard started to stand up, but Q pulled him back down. "Come on, captain, let's have some fun." He snapped his fingers and Picard found himself naked.

"What the--"

"That's better," Q commented in a casual tone and snapped his fingers again.

Now they were in the captain's bedroom. On the captain's bed. And Q was lying on *top* of him. Picard didn't like the way things were going, didn't like it at all.

"Q, stop this at once!" He demanded.

"But I haven't even started yet," Q replied, pouting. "Don't worry, you'll like it."

"I don't--" Picard gasped as Q reached down and started to stroke his cock at a slow, almost lazy pace.

"You were saying?"

"S-Stop it."

"You're so stubborn. Why do humans have to complicate everything? Why can't you just enjoy what you get? You should be honoured, you know, I don't just go around masturbating Starfleet captains everyday. You want me to stop? Fine."

He released Picard and got up from the bed. The captain sat up slightly, propping himself up on his elbows. He tried to glare, but flushed and panting as he was -not to mention naked- the result was more comical than menacing.

"Is that the 'get out of my sight right now' look?" Q asked. Picard only narrowed his eyes. "Yes, it must be. Okay, I'll leave. Bonne nuit, mon capitaine." He snapped his fingers and vanished.

Picard sighed and let himself fall back on the bed.

"Oh, I almost forgot!"

He closed his eyes and groaned. Was the night *ever* going to end?

"I can't just leave you in that state, now can I?"

Q's comment instantly alarmed Picard. He opened his eyes just in time to see the entity grin and snap his fingers one last time. He gasped as his body was assaulted by a sea of sensations, each different from the other, but all unbearably good.

He could barely hear Q say, "Sweet dreams," before it all became too much and he was coming like he hadn't come in God knew how long. When he came back to his senses he was still panting.

He looked around the room. No sign of Q. He took a deep breath and reached for the sheets. He needed a shower, but was too drowsy to have one.

"Computer, turn out the light."

He turned over and buried his head in the pillow. Second best wasn't so bad after all.

Comments

[ladykardasi.livejournal.com]

Heh heh, oh yeah, I liked this. Typically Q! Thanks for making me smile, girl!

[thisveryinstant.livejournal.com]

I missed this the first time around. I've been a pretty spotty reader since the beginning of the year, just b/c RL has been so hectic. Thanks for directing me here :-)

Hee! Oh, I wasn't expecting the ending. But it was perfect. In character for both of them: Picard wouldn't let things go anywhere, no matter how much he wanted them to, and Q wouldn't leave without proving his point. Also, writers often forget that Q is OMNIPOTENT. So, yes, I really like the end. And the snappy dialogue.

The world needs more P/Q!

[gothikmaus.livejournal.com]

Thank you! =)

I was watching "Attached" a couple of weeks ago (my dad bought me Season 7 of TNG on DVD - wheee!) and toward the end of the episode I was like, "Oh yes, Picard *finally* gets laid!" And then... Beverly just left! I was like "WTF? He wants you, you want him, just shag already!" I mean, I don't remember much of TOS, but I seem to remember that Kirk was always shagging some hot alien or the other, while Picard never gets any (poor thing). Okay, the ladies' man in TNG is Riker, but our dear captain needs love too. Or at least a good orgasm every now and then. ^_^

Well, anyway. Thanks for commenting, I had fun writing this ficlet and I'm glad you had fun reading it. =)

[eligyah.livejournal.com]

Ha ha I loved it! A little short maybe *grins* but so funny! :)

As I already said, I like the Picard/Q relationship, and even if I was asked to write some slash story I never could :D

I prefer read them and I liked the way you portrayed both men, I could *see* the scene :)

Thanks for this entertainment!

[gothikmaus.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked it! I know it's short, but it was meant to be just a ficlet, maybe someday I'll write something longer...

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Nicely done - a lovely read! :)

[(Anonymous)]

I'm a new P/Q slash fan. I kick myself that I didn't see it when I was watching first time round, but hey I was young. Ending in character for Q, well done. The way he comes up behind him is spot on as is the implication that Q has been listening in, as he *is* Picard's stalker type person. Q is the perfect slash for P, no one else would do, IMO. I cant understand Picard and Crusher, that woman and her son bring down the standard of the whole show. Maybe if they had been acted better they would be more believable...